March 1st, I embarked on a 31 Day Fast. I am not on Social Media, enjoying a life of clean eating, along with exercise, limited TV and not doing any type of interaction with friends and only immediate family. Praying twice daily for clarity on some life decisions and for the answers for others, who sent me prayer requests.
After 9 days, my senses have cleared tremendously, they are more sharpened. I can see beyond distractions and my time has been put to use doing things of value. My long talks with God has been a back and forth negotiation of sorts. I hear his voice clearly, there is no compromise. Revelations on who and what, I should put my time into starting in April. It has been hard!! He is revealing the truth behind the veil…It is during these times, I can really sense a spiritual shaking in my life. I can hear the spiritual battle taking place between good and evil. My spirit man communicates with God, accepting responsibility for sin and repenting hourly…every second sometimes. God knows my heart. He knows everything…everything we believe is hidden.
Most evenings I sit in silence, listening to praise and worship music. I am hearing every single word. Applying it to my life…applying it to my life, yes really applying it! Questioning whether I adhere to it or just sing it? Do I rock and raise my hands to the beat or the fact it truly applies to my life? Does it truly minister to my spirit man, because I am seeking change, guidance or simply something that I have overcome? All these questions came forth in my silence and I had to take an honest look at myself, my life, my circle of friends and my future.
Initially I sought Gods daily answers on what scriptures to study. Every evening, God gave me a Chapter. Its awe inspiring that each one centered on sin in some form. How one mans downfall can affect all who are within reach. How our faith must withstand challenges, pitfalls and be put to major tests. How each point of our lives, each place we are planted is important to our process. I begin to decipher the sin in my own life, the excuses I made and the changes I would need to put in place.
Several days ago, God pushed me into Revelation…the end times. I believe it is paramount and no coincidence that I have developed a passion for this book. It can be a scary book for many…yet a comfort for those who truly are committed to living for Christ. Revelation will scare the hell of folks…literally!
As I sit in silence, I stare at myself more in the mirror. Wondering if my sin is just as visible on me as it is on others. I’m taking note of each and every person I come in contact with. I study their face, their eyes, their skin. I smile, they smile back. I can often see the stress, the chaos, the sin in their lives…yes its visible. It manifests itself, whether we attempt to hide it or not. Its not cute to look at on everyone, better yet yourself.
As I sit in silence, I realize that this walk with Christ is not easy, yet its paramount to get it right…not perfect…but right.
Right, requires a renewing of the mindset, right requires a heart transplant, right requires a spiritual death. Right, requires a decision on our part. Right requires patience. Right requires faith.
However right, brings a multitude of blessings…right brings peace, right brings love, right brings light..right brings clarity.
As I sit in silence, away from every thing and everyone…even some people who I hold dear and near to my heart, I can do nothing but hold on to faith…press through…pray through..listen through…
Because I know Right brings Life
…and I’d rather have that over death any day..