What are little boys made of?


The first instant replay was recorded in Genesis! Genesis 1 gives us a play by play overview of the beginning of the world. In Genesis 2:4-8 God formed man, The Hebrew word for formed is the same word that is used of a potter forming and shaping clay. It suggests an artistic, inventive activity that requires skill and planning- a work that is done with great care and precision.

We can only imagine what it must have been like for God to take simple dust from the ground and to skillfully fashion it into man with countless atoms, cells, organs and complex intricate systems that mystify brilliant scientists.

Then lo and behold, God breathed his own breath into the form so that he became a living soul, a reflection of his own likeness!. He created him out of the dust of the ground, then placed him in the garden of Eden. The Hebrew word for garden indicates an enclosure, a plot of ground protected by a wall or hedge. This designated space was to be man’s new home, where he would be joined with a wife and start a family.

Later we see in Genesis 2, that when a man gets married, he leaves his family or origin, in order to initiate a new family unit. So when God put man in the garden, it appears God set the man up in his own place to be head of a new home.

The mans responsibility to leave and launch a new family unit indicates that taking initiative is at the core of what it means to be a man. God doesn’t want boys to remain boys. He wants them to become men. He wants them to grow up, leave their parents, launch out, start new households and become the men He created them to be.

From the man’s perspective: “Quality is the standard of something as measured against other things of a similar kind; the degree of excellence of something. Also meaning a distinctive attribute or characteristic possessed by someone or something.

There are many qualities that men possess and there are many qualities that are looked at in a man from a woman or anyone’s prospective. As it applies to women, A man’s qualities should compare to a woman’s father…. if the father was present in your life. He should display similar qualities.  Nevertheless, he should display Godly qualities. He cannot be measured from  TV or reality shows. He must be measured to the standards that were instilled in you as a child or from the example of a male figure from your childhood. Many woman and men try to compare their spouse or significant other to someone they know or some love story they have seen on TV or read in a book.

Even though, you may look for qualities that were displayed earlier in your life, the man should show qualities of a man after Gods heart. If he is doing this, he will do just as the word tells us in Genesis 2. When he marries, he will leave his family and build his own empire. He will lead his family with the guidance of God’s word!

Many woman make the mistake of comparing men to previous relationships or what their friends and family relationships look like. We are all different and women all look for different qualities in a man. Don’t miss the man that God has for you because you are comparing him to someone’s man. There are some women whose standards are lower than yours and their quality of men may not  meet your qualities.

Have you ever wondered if your qualities were to high for any man to meet and maybe this is why you are alone?

Look for the qualities that display a Godly man, qualities that he is seeking God for the relationship FIRST.  If his qualities look anything Godly, you are starting in the right place for a man with the qualities that will make you an excellent husband.”

Well there you have it! Its time to reevaluate your now and future relationships against the Godly measuring stick!

Love you my sisters




Created Equal?


Are Men and Women created equal?

Both have equal worth, value and dignity as bearers of God’s image. Male and female are equally part of the creation that He called “man”

In an effort to not be offensive, some modern translations of the Bible have tried to obscure the gender imagery found in Hebrew text. They have substituted “human beings” etc for the word “man” and “them” for the word “him”. But in the Hebrew text, this verse clearly says that “man” equals “him” equals “male and female”

So why does the Bible call humankind “man”? Genesis 1:27 gives us the stunning truth that all humans bear the divine image- men and women bear it equally. It also states that God refers to us collectively with a singular male pronoun. In choosing the word “man” as the common name, God indicated that male and female would share a common condition for which he would provide a common solution.

God actually underlined the profound unity and equality that exist between us. This common name shows that women comes from man and is not independent of him. It shows that both sexes exist to tell the story of God and that this story is told together- with both male and female as parts of a unified whole

You see the story line of gender is not about male and female, its not about us at all, its about the man JESUS CHRIST! The man whose redemptive work applies to both sexes equally

The Hebrew word for man is adam, which is closely related to the word for ground, adamah. Its a generic term that refers to all human beings. After the fall, Adam becomes the proper name of the first male. And later Jesus Christ comes as the last Adam to redeem “adam” (mankind) and bring many sons and daughters of God to glory!

In God’s eye the female is as much a part and expression of “adam” as the male. This means that both can trace their beginnings to the dirt of the ground. Both bear God’s image fully and individually. It means that God values both equally! Because both are “adam” both are equally represented by the first man, Adam.

Both are fallen and in need of a savior and the good news is that both are equally represented by the second man-the last Adam-Jesus Christ! Together we make up the church, He loves, the bride, He sacrificed His life to redeem. Male and female  are connected. Together-united as a whole- they tell the story of the gospel

Although we are different, we are equally important to God’s plan.

When God named male and female “adam”He had the last Adam in mind. So when we appease the whims of man, we change “man” to something we think is more inclusive, but in doing that we diminish the true meaning of the word

If woman is not part of man, then how can she be represented by the first man, more importantly, how can she be represented by the last man, Jesus Christ.

I would love to hear your thoughts. Email me or drop your comments below!



Additional Readings:  Genesis 5:2, 1 Corinthians 5:45, 1 Corinthians 15:22

The men in my life…

1197125532348495319kumar35885_Male_Symbol_svg_hiSo I’ve been chatting with the men in my life…yes ALL the men in my life. I mean men like my father, my brother, close male friends and the list continues.  My conversation with my male friends have been informative, comical and entertaining.  Their opinions on women, children, love and life have been interesting, even when they are off the mark!

However, it is the men in my family who have been my role models. The ones who I watch and learn from. Over my 43 years, I have observed them grow through life…taking trials, tribulations and bruises. They have fallen and bounced back…and fallen …and bounced back again.

My father, my first love, has a different perspective on life. His ‘just do it” mentality has often found him in a difficult situations. Yet he eventually crawls back to the top. He has taught me that sometimes you must do what you have to do …and deal with the consequences later.  He is determined, yet stubborn,  temperamental, yet soft-hearted… comical, yet hard-headed and the death of my mother in 2006 is still fresh to him. He talks about her everyday, as if she transitioned yesterday. I can see a soft light in his eyes flicker and then lose its glow after the realization that she is no longer here materializes. It is a  love beyond the grave and he won’t be content until he sees her again.  I pray that someone loves me in that way, whether I am here or long gone…

My one and only brother has a vastly different approach on life. He waits patiently for it to bend to his whim, succumb to his desires. He often carries the weight of the world’s expectations on his broad shoulders, yet he is the epitome of professionalism. He works diligently to make a difference, waiting for the rest of the world to do their part.  At the ripe young age of 30, he is an old soul with a desire to see all at peace in the world….

Then there are my uncles, they are four different men who have four different outlooks on life . Their stories are remarkable and it is through them, I have compared my experiences with the male species along the way. The four brothers of my mother have given me an outlook that I am blessed to embrace.  I have observed them from a young girl and although I was young, I knew them, knew their lives, their loves and their secrets. I paid attention to how they responded and reacted to situations and circumstances and I took notes.

The oldest showed me what essential love looks like. A love that must be displayed, even when all is not right in your world. A love that never changes even when you are not being treated well. A love simply “because…..” He has raised two sons and others whose mothers claimed were his. As a single father, his journey has and still is not easy.  He is making it…with many prayers. He lovingly embraced a son who was not his own, yet he took on the role without a second thought. “Righting” the wrongs that perhaps he felt were of his own doing, not realizing that God’s plan was bigger than his own.  That same son, who was given to him to raise, like his siblings have made us all proud…we are all blessed to be privy to their accomplishments.

Then there is my  Uncle Mike, one who embraces life and makes the world turn on his axis. He does not succumb to the whims of anyone. Strong willed and grounded on every aspect of his life, unmovable it may seem, yet his heart is always on full. On the outside, he is solid, yet I believe that his private times are spent deep in thought on subjects that others are not aware of.  He cherishes his time and does what his heart desires, when the need arises.  From him, I have learned that time waits for no one or nothing… and ignoring foolish people and their antics keeps your blood pressure low!

My Uncle Dereyk is the most different, yet recently I realized that perhaps he is similar to me. He rarely shows up at family gatherings, yet when he does, I can see the nostalgic in his eyes. Sometimes a look of yearning or pain is evident. He dreams of moments past, places and times of long ago, people who held special places in his heart. I dare to say that he will always  be one who “wishes” for better days.  But whom of us does not long for a time when  life was just a little bit sweeter, I know I do everyday…

Finally , there is my Uncle Hank, the younger of the group, yet he is a free and a wise spirit. His journey has not been easy, but he has overcome…and still continues to do so daily.  His laughter and comical captions to life are what we all should be embracing…for even our tribulation has a funny side….we must just be able to find it.  Although he wishes that dear ones long gone could see the person he turned out to be. I dare to say they already knew the remarkable person inside, one who could beat the odds and win in the end.  My Uncle Hank, has taught me the most about life. Each time I see or hear from him , it gives me courage to stay focused on the journey.  He reminds me to stay seated and buckled in…even when the ride has stopped for you to exit at the rear..

These are just a few of the lessons I have learned, although I have many other men in my life,  these men make me the woman I am.  I am thankful they are still here…still able to be my role mentors…

Perhaps they were who I desired my own partner to be like. After 22 years of marriage, it failed due to many reasons …and I shared in the demise. This month, my life came full circle, I regained everything I lost along the three years of separation from my ex. Surprisingly, I did not think about the past….or wonder “what could have been.”  I was overjoyed and shared my testimony with the important people …which consisted of these particular men in my life.

It was then  I realized my ex never seemed to hit the mark. He was not the man who I hoped for and unfortunately it took me 22 years to figure it out or perhaps that long to walk away.

Maybe the bar was set too high from the beginning…

Peace, Love & Empowerment